If it's not your intention to prolong your submissive's discomfort -- and if it's an honest mistake, it shouldn't be -- make it clear that you think the matter is closed and there will be no further discipline necessary. Ideally my submissive has a sincere desire to serve me well -- in which case punishing for an honest mistake is unwarranted. If the submissive is not sincere then we're not a good match for anything -- outside of casual play.
Punishment as discipline Some people think punishment is essential to a D/s relationship. Personally I don't care for punishment -- outside of "erotic torture," role playing, or scene play. I think BDSM is for mutual enjoyment and a sub -- masochistic or otherwise -- will not enjoy true punishment. (If the sub does enjoy the punishment then it's really not punishment, is it?)
Punishment or ritual for closure: being cruel to be kind. In her workshop on ritual, Mistress Constance points out that punishment can be for benefit of the sub's well being. When your sub is distraught over his failure and it's not enough for him that you think the matter is closed, it would be in his interest to absolve his failure though a ritual or act of discipline. If the ritual absolution is not enough, decide upon an unpleasant consequence: either restrict him from something he does enjoy such as body worship or sentence him to a duty or an activity he dislikes such as flogging him with the nasty rubber flogger he hates.
Punishment as play. Punishment can be a game where the infraction is inconsequential and you use it as an excuse for an activity that you both enjoy. "You naughty little boy!" you might say. "I caught you peeking and now you'll have to massage my feet." It's important that you both recognize this for what it is and you both enjoy this type of play.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment